A Perfectionist's Lament

Has anyone ever accused you of being “OCD”? It’s happened to me more than a few times. Usually it was expressed good naturedly but not always. Recently I even referred to myself as “a little OCD”.  And then I wondered, what’s the difference between perfectionism and obsessive-compulsive disorder? The Google rabbit hole on this topic is vast, but here is the best explanation I could find.  

“Perfectionism stems from a desire to excel, achieve flawless results, or avoid external judgment. OCD is driven by intense fear, anxiety, or intrusive thoughts.”

So most of us have been using the term all wrong.

OCD is an actual mental health disorder.  So, unless you’re a doctor, you shouldn’t be labeling anyone with a mental health disorder, full stop.

When I used the label on myself, I was trying to preempt criticism. That’s a typical tactic of the insecure. The classic example is, “This is probably a stupid idea but what if…”

If you listen to people complaining about others, they say things like, “He’s so sloppy!”  Or conversely, “She’s completely OCD.” We all believe we’re the sensible ones. Obviously, anyone tidier than I am must be weird and anyone messier than I am is sloppy.

Based on my reading, I do not have obsessive compulsive disorder. Thank goodness, because it doesn’t sound fun. However, I am a perfectionist which comes with some baggage too. Yes, I’m highly motivated to achieve but I also can be hyper-critical of my work. Some days it’s immobilizing to read the rough draft from the day before. I tell myself, to ignore the spelling, punctuation and miscellaneous digressions; just take Annie Lamott’s advice. Write a “shitty first draft,” and fix it later.

Ha! That’s easier said than done.